The Diva's Random Thoughts

Yesterday a coworker and I went on a client site visit for a benefits fair. Since we are one of their vendors they wanted us onsite at their fair to help support employees with benefits questions.

Everything was going along swimmingly until towards the end of the day. One of the employees of the company walks in to the room where we were stationed and made small talk. He made some reference to it being close to the end of the day and I simply agreed with him and said, "Yeah, we are going to be wrapping things up pretty soon." Why oh why did my untactful coworker blurt out, "And I can't wait!! Boy I can't wait to leave!"

I never begged for a hole to swallow me up harder then I did that very moment. Oye Vey!

Another Installment of Ask Tee.


Letter #1

Dear Tee,

My husband was hurt in a fall and although we live together we no longer have an emotional or sexual relationship of any kind. I do feel obligated to take care of him but do these circumstances justify me looking elsewhere for love and sex?

Starved for affection

My Answer:

Dear Starved for Affection

I think you should have a heart to heart talk with your husband. Let him know exactly how you feel about the situation. I'm not sure of the extent of his injuries or his situation but if he is unable to perform sexually that is no reason he can not find other ways to fulfill you. As a married couple, we must have the connection that true intimacy brings. We have to have that in order to be fulfilled. There are so many practices, techniques and devices that allow us to maintain our connections with our partners once the physicality is gone.

I take marriage vows seriously and believe you stick it out during the good and bad times but both parties have to do their part.

If your husband is unwilling to connect with you on a meaningful level then he is essentially breaking the marriage vows you took together.

If you feel you can not go on in this situation then be honest and tell him you must seek love and affection elsewhere. I'm not saying abandon him. Hopefully telling him what you need and coming up with suggestions on how to reconnect will help you both.

Communication is the best way to go. Be upfront with him.

I hope this helps.


Letter #2

Dear Tee,

My little sister has been dealing with a lot of drama lately. I kind of find it
amusing, but I decided to write in for her sake:

What advice do you have for my sister whose friend promised to make her life hell? It all started when my sister fell madly in love with her crazy friend's ex-boyfriend. The friend cheated on him and broke up with him over a year ago. When she found out that the 2 had been flirting online and really liked each other, she freaked out. My sister is afraid she'll get her tires slashed. I think her friend will just talk bad about her to everyone they know.

Kids have always grappled with drug use and peer pressure since we can all remember. A teenager makes friends with a certain crowd, that crowd dabbles in a little drug use so the teen follows suite not wanting to be singled out.

Back in my day I was no different. Although my close friends did not partake in drugs I “encountered” random people that did use drugs occasionally. I remember being in high school one sunny afternoon and I was hanging out in a stairwell with some classmates during lunch. These particular classmates decided to smoke a joint right there. I was a little taken aback but I always go with the flow and I can adapt easily. No worries. They began passing this joint around and when it reached me I kindly declined. The one person that I was closest to yelled out, “Oh come on Tee, don’t be a square.” That did not persuade me one way or the other, I was steadfast and the others continued getting high while I watched on.

It was easy for me to say no on that day. It was easy because I was literally afraid. Scared out of my mind. Scared of what you may ask….scared to death my parents would find out and kick my little ass that’s what!

My parents had the uncanny ability to know what I was doing and when. It amazed me that I could walk into the house at any given time and my mother would ask, “ Why did you do that today?” and I’d just look at her in stunned silence. They would never give up their sources. My parents didn’t play. My father was straight old school and believed in kicking a kid’s ass.

I say this to say that parents, YOU are the deterrent your kids need to not take drugs. Instill a little fear in them and they will not step out of line. It sure as hell worked for me.

As mentioned in the text message displayed across this here blog, I've begun a new feature named "Ask Tee". Ask Tee is an advice column of sorts. You can ask any question,serious or not so much and I will give you my uncensored opinion on the matter.

I received a few really good letters but had to narrow it down to the two we will address today. Without further ado here is Ask Tee letter #1:

Dear Tee,

I have been with this guy for 7 years. I love him dearly but he changes the subject every time I approach the subject of marriage. What should I do? I love him but I think I am wasting my time.

Signed Never A Bride

My Response:

Dear Never A Bride,

How can I put this delicately.....leave! If he has not expressed any interest in marrying you and it's been 7 years, you are clearly wasting your time.


Ask Tee Letter #2

Dear Tee,

My best friend of 5 years stole $150 from my purse. Should I beat her down?

Signed I Need My Money

It has become increasingly clear to me recently that people just don't know what they want. I know that statement can be attributed to both men and women but my focus today is on men.

Men really don't know what they want. I'm not even sure they realize that themselves. Let's narrow down this statement further and zero in on their dating habits. Men join dating sites under the guise of wanting to find a mate but what they really want is just another one night stand or prolonged booty call partner that's at their disposal.

I have several single female friends and they all have the exact same complaint. The men they meet have just one goal and that is to get them into bed.

Whatever happened to waiting on that, getting to know each other first? If you were serious about wanting a mate then you wouldn't be so quick to rush things. Just my observation.

As of recent I have developed a total disdain for Slomin's Shield security. In my opinion they are nothing more then unsympathetic shysters. Apparently I am not the only on who feels this way. Here's the back story.

A few years ago my mother decided to install an alarm system in her home provided by Slomin's. Everything was going well until she took ill and became disabled. She was forced to move into an Assistant Living facility. Her health has since declined to the point I am now looking into a nursing home for her. Since she moved out of her home She stopped paying for an alarm system she was not going to use. She informed Slomin's that she no longer needed their services.

Apparently Slomin's contract they had her sign was for 5 years and she completed 2 years on that contract. They were trying to force her to pay for 3 years of service that she could not use. They began legal proceedings against this woman. Nice.

When I saw the legal papers I called Slomin's then the attorney's representing Slomin's myself to inform them that my mother was disabled, living in a home and bed ridden. They did not want to hear of this and forced the issue.

They set a court date for last week and I attended on my mothers behalf. I explained to the judge my mothers situation but to no avail. Slomin's received what the judge called an "empty judgement" against my mother since they could not attach her disability payments although if they could those bastards would have.

I am really pissed off that these bastards go around suing people that should never be sued. My mother did not choose to get sick and disabled. She did not choose to have to move into a nursing home.

Slomin's Shield security are a bunch of crooks going around ruining peoples credit. Just read what the others had to say.

Please do not ever choose to purchase a Slomin's security system you will be very sorry.